Sense and Sensitivity

Sense and Sensitivity

I received an email the other day from the Executive Director of the business networking chapter of which I am a part. One of the requirements is that new members be indoctrinated into the organization by taking a session that helps them to learn the basics of the organizations premise. This session had for many years been done in person, but due to the COVID19 pandemic was moved online during 2020. It takes about 4 to 5 hours to complete the 16 videos that are part of the series.

Fortunately our chapter has brought on a number of new members recently. All the new members have been accepted well into the chapter, and have become contributors to the group success. However, each member has different circumstances and family obligations. As such, it may be easier for some to jump on a potential item than another. The Executive Director was taking me to task, (as I serve as the Mentor Leader for the group), for two of the new members not having completed all the videos. Before even asking if there were any issues, I was told I needed to deliver a harsh message to them quickly and get them up to speed.

Again, each new member we have taken on has gotten quickly indoctrinated into the chapter. All the members are both getting to know the new members, sharing business with them, and vice versa. That is the primary reason the group is in existence. We also know both new members singled out are working mothers who have their families to care for along with their jobs. In addition, one of the new members has had a COVID outbreak in her family and has had to keep her husband isolated from the rest of the family. I was quick in my rebuke to the Executive Director in letting her know that I had everything under control and was not guiding the situation by “rules,” but by common sense. I was closer to what was happening with the members than was she. I was using what I would like to call my (common) Sense and Sensitivity.

Yes life needs to go on while the world faces the biggest pandemic that it has faced in 102 years. And, yes some people are more likely to be at risk of catching the virus and being seriously ill from it than others. And, yes, many businesses have taken precautions to keep their customers as safe as possible. But, there is another side to all this.

Many people have had their lives altered considerably. Some have lost their jobs and are struggling to find new employment. Others still have children learning remotely from home, and need to be there with them. Still others may have lost a relative or loved one from the events of the last year, and are still coping with that loss, even to the point of not having had full closure from that happening.

I am obviously, from the type of work I do as a Career Coach, most closely connected to those in job search. One of the biggest tools in “the job searchers” arsenal when looking for their next position is networking with others. In some way that is more difficult than before, since it is an opportunity that is less likely to be done in person. However, in some ways it is easier, because more people are easier to track down as they are more likely to be in one place, (at home, on the computer, working virtually, connecting virtually). However, when working and guiding my clients I advise them that when they do reach out to connect with someone, no matter who it is, first ask them a few questions. Ask them how they are doing personally and how their family are doing? Ask them how they may have had to adapt their life because of the pandemic and its consequences? If their Linked In profile seems to show they are with a new line of work or company, ask how that may have come about. Don’t assume anything. Establish or re-establish the relationship and build the personal contact first before asking for things such as information you may want to get, or contacts with another person, or if they know of any job leads.

No matter what it is you may be contacting someone about, be SENSITIVE to the fact that their situation may not be anywhere like yours. Realize that you lose nothing by have a “Sense of Sensitivity” before engaging another. And, above all, realize those of us who really move forward in this life first consider the needs and feelings of the other person, instead of focusing strictly on ourselves and our needs at the moment.