Even I Get Rejected

Even I Get Rejected

When one is in job search, one of the realizations is that rejection is part of the process. That has always been the case. However, in today’s job search world more than ever, I feel that the topic tends to get magnified. Recently I have worked with clients who have felt they were rejected because of their age, because the person hiring felt they would be making too much money, that the interviewer was a millennial, and because they were not from that generation and would not consider them. The reasons go on and on. And, while there could be some validity of truth to any of them, they often are “an excuse,” for shifting the blame onto others. The reality is we are all rejected at some time or another in our life, some people more than others, and often when we least want it to happen.

While the above paragraph may sound harsh, often when we are not sure of ourselves, we are more likely to not be accepted by others, especially in the job hiring environment. When someone hires us for to work for them, they need to feel confident our services will meet their needs. Those in sales and entrepreneurial services learn that lesson very quickly. I have been coaching for nearly 10 years now, the last 7 with a focus on job search strategy. While there are many clients with whom I have worked, and who have been thankful and appreciative of the time that they worked with me, there are still far more that choose not to work with me. Why might that be?

I always offer everyone that chooses to work with me a complimentary discussion before we begin working together. I’ll want to hear their situation, and how they feel my services may help them. In turn, I will look to give them an honest assessment of what I would expect of them in the process of our working together. For some, the rejection of my services come when they feel they don’t have the time to commit to the process. They are sure there has to be an easier or quicker way. Others, will balk at the cost of my services, not sure they will find value in using them. Still others have every intent of committing to work with me but then get sidetracked by other aspects in their life. And, for still others, the search process, for whatever reason, is not as important to them at this time as they originally felt.

Sometimes I can sense right away if a client will not choose to work with me. I can tell from their body language, their lack of enthusiasm in the initial conversation, they’re expressed doubts about the process. However, other times I do get fooled. I sense the consultation, (which is similar to a hiring interview) has gone well. The perspective client sounds very interested. They assure me they will follow up with me. And, then time passes, and I realize they have decided to not move forward. While it may be disappointing at times, (especially when I know I could have been of help to them), I move on. I focus on the clients I have, the next perspective client to reach out, and know that I still know more about my area of expertise and what works and does not work as well in it than just about anyone I meet.

Why did the perspective client decide I was not the coach for them? I certainly don’t focus on things that I cannot change such as my age. If they felt my rates were too expensive, (when I know they are actually on the lower end of the coaching scale), I know that I need to stay true to myself as a professional. And, if they decide to work with another coach, perhaps that coach was a better fit for them. (On the other hand, I have had coaches who know me well refer clients to me, when they believe who I am or how I work is better potential fit for that client).

When you are rejected, and once you get over the initial disappointment, MOVE ON! Look to get other opportunities moving forward. Strategize approaches that you may use in a future encounter that may be lessons learned from what happened. Above all, don’t beat yourself up and make the situation feel hopeless because of things YOU CANNOT CHANGE! And, respect there are two sides to every equation, and that you need to continue to search for that “fit” that is going to match and balance best for you.